My Best Meal Ever

Jill Lewis / Heavy Table

Dear Diary,

OMG, I just ate the best. meal. ever. I know my words won’t be able to do it justice, but I want to try because I know I will remember this day — and this food — for the rest of my life.

I’m not exactly sure what to call this meal. I ate it in the morning (2 am, to be exact) but it definitely wasn’t breakfast, and I hadn’t eaten anything else since lunch, so for simplicity’s sake, let’s call it dinner. But what I can confirm is that it was hand-delivered to me and came with unlimited apple juice, so I knew right off the bat that it would be a winner.

I started with the veggie wrap, which contained exactly three vegetables: carrots, tomatoes, and black olives. Normally, I detest black olives and they were the most prominent vegetable by far in the wrap, but today I didn’t mind their mealy texture or off-putting flavor. Any mushiness was offset by the stiffness of the tortilla. I’m guessing it had seen better days, but hey, it did the trick. It was large enough that the olives (and random specks of carrot and tomato) didn’t fall out onto my haute couture gown, and do you think the green color counts as another vegetable? I sure hope so. After the day I’ve had, I need all the nutrients I can get!

Next up, applesauce. I don’t eat much applesauce these days, maybe because my 2-year-old consumes so much of it that there is rarely any left for me. So it was a treat to savor its baby-food texture and hint of apple flavor. I almost felt like I should have eaten it with a spoon featuring a cartoon character on the handle and washed it down with a beverage via sippy cup, but alas, neither were available at this establishment.

I didn’t hold a grudge, though, because my next course was so unbelievable — unbelievably salty, that is. I know the bag said “potato chips,” but I’m pretty sure there wasn’t any actual potato involved. All I tasted was salt. Luckily, I love salt, and considering all the fluids that my body absorbed today, it was nice to even it out with a little extra sodium. Finger-licking good.

I saved the best for last. Not only did I get Oreo cookies, the forbidden treat of my childhood, but I got four of them. Four. I expected two in that little plastic pack, so imagine my delight when I opened it and found double that. I would have done a happy dance, but it really wasn’t the time or place for dancing. Maybe when I regain feeling in my legs.

So that was it — the world’s most awesome meal. I hope you have the chance to experience it for yourself sometime.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot — the baby is doing great! He’s ready to enjoy his perfect meal, too, which means I have to say good-bye for now. But the nurse says I can get toast with peanut butter whenever I want. Four stars for Methodist Hospital!

‘Til next time,


  1. artsy

    Mazeltov Jill- I will always remember this post, first my shock at the photo and its seeming dissonance with ‘best meal ever’ ,then my gradual realization of the situation………

    what’s his name?

    by the way, my mother had 2 nutrition requirements for us growing up- every day you had to have fruit and some protein. Cottage cheese would satisfy the protein requirement, and…apple sauce..would satisfy the fruit one. We bought cases of Mott’s applesauce and had it with just about every meal. Good stuff.

    -faith lubitz

  2. Eileen

    Ha! Very funny post. I distinctly remember after my first son was born, lifting the lid off the plate of hospital food, thinking “Mmmmm! Hospital fish!!” and really meaning it! Food has never tasted so good.

  3. Christine

    Thank you for bringing back very sweet memories of the veggie pasta I scarfed down so gratefully for my 11am lunch after giving birth to my 2nd child and the midnight turkey sandwich with my 1st. Tears in my eyes! Enjoy every meal with your little one!

  4. emily

    so funny. i remember after giving birth to my son, thinking i’d never before experienced such amazing peanut butter toast. blessings!

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